a Soul Project

archival : ruining things :

How do I describe what it feels like when you remove your affection?
I withdraw into my shell like some retreating bivalve.
And you tell me that we should back off a bit,
that we should take it slow.
But do you understand that I am taking it slow?
I've been effectively shackling myself just to move at your pace,
the casual relationship you initiated.
But now you regret it?
Now you're getting cold feet?
And we haven't even talked, I've just pulled my hair out and cried my eyes to shreds
over an unknown decision made without my input, about you and me.
And it took every fiber of my strength to open up to you
when you tore your way inside.
Do you know what that did to me?
So many questions destined to remain rhetorical.
I'm a lover. I love you, okay. I love you and thus, don't want your rejection.