a Soul Project

archival : thankful, again :

Now now, Kaylin.
Its a double-entry night, for sure.
Triple! If you count my studious record-keeping.
This time, though, I'll spill a bit more.
Though as a warning, there'll be slightly more splash.

Sweetheart! Love! Baby! Darling!
Mostly, he's just Gerald.
I'm lucky this is a private journal.
We've still only told select people,
though I must admit we take more and more risks every day.
It's getting scary! But we'll manage.
Somehow, I trust him.
Somehow, I trust him completely.
Somehow, I could be content with putting my life in his hands,
and I could rest assured it'd be well taken care of.
How many people do you know like that?
I've never known one (and family doesn't count), but for Andrew.
Sweetheart! I'll even cook for you (gosh I hate cooking)!
Love! I'll clean our house and wash our clothes!
Baby! I'll help support our every need
Darling! I'll be your best friend and confidant.

I looked back on my December 1st entries with sheer pride.
I wrote those then so I wouldn't forget them,
so that maybe I could add them slowly to my life repitoire...
and now I'm living them.
I say that with confidence.
I didn't know it then (though I'd pledged!)
but I would continue to accept you,
would continue to feel that tug towards conscious care for you.
I want you safe and intact in the exact condition
you'd wish upon your self.
Please, only change for you. I'll accept you.
And if you never change... shall I just repeat myself?