archival : a reminder of who you are :
I'm seeing how much Paul is like the old me.
I'm realizing how this is,
even after what he called his first girlfriend,
his first time falling in love.
And I'm wondering whether I can stand the weight.
I'm realizing how unfair it was of me
to put that kind of responsibility
in Chris's hands and on his shoulders.
For this I'm finally sorry, Chris.
I left you with the organization of my thoughts,
my feelings and my ardor.
I never even gave you the chance to breathe,
to formulate your plan, your path.
I really wasn't your one, was I.
And I had myself fooled that I was what you wanted.
And now, being in your position,
seeing it from your side, I am so sorry
I drove you to do the things
you never wished to do.
And so I'm wondering if I'll be driven there,
and how I'll deal with it instead, knowing how I felt
in Paul's position.
And have we even come as far as that?
I'd like to think we haven't,
but like you, that's just my perspective.